


A Beautiful Bittersweet

by FreakCityPrincess



Category: Artemis Fowl - Eoin Colfer
Genre: Angst and Humor, Dark Fantasy, F/M, Humor, In-character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2016-04-11
Packaged: 2018-04-19 17:43:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4755335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FreakCityPrincess/pseuds/FreakCityPrincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A story can have a happy or sad ending. Rarely, when they're both, victory is often bittersweet and the tears of war roll down past smiling lips. Drabbles with genres like the title suggests, but not cheesy angst or ridiculously dark. In-character A/H with some twisted plans for revenge, a bit of muttered humor, feasible plots and the sweet, sweet scent of grass and citrus.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Adrift in Fours

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wheredwellthe_brave_atheart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wheredwellthe_brave_atheart/gifts).



Artemis rarely had dreams that didn't make sense.

Of course dreams of his were occasionally pointless. Sometimes they'd include long-forgotten relatives, dreaded food items, and many a time would be revolving around certain adversaries faced in the past, but very rarely did they lack meaning. In his dreams, mutant penguins and possessed Teletubbies made sense. There would always be a plot, always a reason things were the way they were. A failed cloning experiment. A rip in the space-time continuum brought on by the latest misadventure. But rarely did they have none of these things.

No, he had woken up this time around at a pre-dawn hour, when his room was starting to transition from pitch black to dark grey, and despite the useless effort of every window in the walls to keep out the Autumn cold, his white nightshirt was soaked around the collar in odourless, oddly watery sweat. 

Artemis muttered a few words to himself, sinking back slowly into the double pillows he'd just propped up. Tomorrow–actually, today was set to be a momentous occasion. The second ever large-scale launch of a Fowl Industries project. He had a lot of people to meet, and a few places to be, but the irate feeling in his stomach made thoughts of jet-lag seem insignificant and trivial in comparison.

He closed his eyes, but didn't lull himself to sleep. There'd be an alarm going off in an hour or so anyway. Suitcases to pack, places to be. The traditional Fowl thing without the undoubtedly thrilling factor of crime. Oddly enough, he didn't find himself smiling at this. He had reason to not think of it at all.

His eyes flickered to a tiny ring that lay at the foot of a lamp on the bedside table. Tiny, yet so important and something he would never forgive himself for losing.

_Holly's area of Haven must be night by now._

Artemis straightened his back and glanced at the communicator once more.

_Or no, maybe about ten. She might just be awake. She was last time._

He had to keep his hand from reaching out.

_Now is not the time._

Yet he still inched forward.

_Stop it!_

And he did, drawing his fingers in and his hand back, momentarily burying them under the cold white sheets. Drawing his focus away from the ring, his eyes settled on a cylinder of pens on his work desk. In the same cylinder was a triple-folded envelope and a sticker card. Well, the envelope was important. The sticker card was a present from Beckett. 

Unable to bear the drifting any longer, Artemis snatched the ring off its spot and turned it, speakers up. Before he knew what he was doing, he had dialed the only contact on it and switched on the hologram projector. He had, to be perfectly honest, never regretted rigging her communicator so as to immediately activate her camera the moment he switched his on. Once, when this had worked to her disadvantage, Artemis had been rewarded with the amusement of watching her yelp and toss a shampoo bottle at his hologram. This was before she'd known about the rigging.

The communicator rang for what was at least twelve seconds, and here Artemis began entertaining the notion of cutting the line, but the person on the other end did pick up. And her disheveled image appeared in front of him as soon as she did. "D'Arvit, Mud Boy," muttered Holly, wiping the sleep from her eyes. "Who's trying to kill you this time?"

Artemis allowed himself a grin. "You, right after you find out that nobody is trying to kill me."

Holly dropped the communicator beside her as she flopped down on her single bed again. Her auburn hair, now slightly longer than a crew cut but equally as messed, was clear proof of the fact that she'd just woken up from a very disturbed sleep. Possibly one that involved either a dangerous close-combat or an evil hairdresser. Her eyes were rather bleary, too, but just about enough to look annoyed at him. "It's twelve o'clock, Artemis."

Artemis's grin faded. "Really? Then you must be out of Haven."

Holly huffed. "Retrieval. I'm actually in an LEP base in Europe right now. I thought I should drop by to say hello to my favourite Mud Men after, but it looks like one of them has managed to royally get on my nerves now, huh?"

The Mud Boy had the grace to pretend to look guilty. "How could I have known where you were?"

"Oh, I don't know. Couldn't you rig my locator instead of my camera next time?"

"Ah, that's an idea now."

Holly glared. "Aren't you going to go away and let me sleep?"

Artemis smirked. "Does it look like I'm about to yield?"

"D'Arvit to you, Fowl. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were stalking me. Rigging the camera and calling me at this time. What's the matter? No good Mud Ladies out there?"

At this, Artemis was pretty much caught off guard and a slight tinge of colour crossed his features, but it lasted less than a second and he was soon back to his normal antagonizing self who just wanted to royally get on Holly's nerves.

"Perhaps I am stalking you," he said mysteriously. "Check your mailbox when you get home."

Holly snorted a laugh. It was the best she could do in this mood. "When was the last time you talked to a girl?"

Artemis raised an eyebrow.

"Who isn't an elf," specified Holly, giving him a look. "And isn't some sort of colleague either." 

"Let me think," said Artemis a little teasingly. "Well, there was this one pretty waitress at a recent café. She had done eyelash extensions, hair extension, wore coloured contacts and had done a spot of plastic surgery and laser treatment on her face and neck. I asked her for a de-shelled lagoon crab."

Holly held back a chuckle. "I am the only girl you know, aren't I?"

"Unfortunately, the role of forcing me into relationships has already been taken by mother, so I'd rather leave the conversation than continue it."

A slight yawn escaped the elf's lips. She could look extremely... _cute_ at times, despite being very capable of breaking every bone in an ordinary human's body.  Artemis caught himself. _What am I thinking?_

"I think I'm going back to sleep," mumbled Holly, the energy drained from her eyes. "Long field day tomorrow. I'll see if I can drop by, hm?"

Artemis smiled, but it was a little forced. Certain...less-than-necessary thoughts were adrift in his mind. Demons. Time tunnels. Rathdown Park...

"I would appreciate that." His throat felt suddenly dry. _Four_. "Holly."

The elf nodded, eyes now already half closed. "I'll see you soon."

 _Click_.

Artemis immediately pulled open the drawer on the bedside table and dropped the ring inside, soon recoiling back to his original position on the bed, before he'd called her, before he'd sat up.

He knew he should be feeling fine. Lighthearted conversations with familiar people...especially those as familiar as Holly ideally shouldn't leave him feeling empty. But this one, however short-lived and insignificant, somehow did.

Artemis hurriedly opened the drawer and switched the ring back on. The call had lasted for seven minutes and...fifteen seconds. Five. That was good. Seven, he didn't know, but the number ended with a five. It was good. Holly was good. Five letters plus another five in her last name. She could be trusted, he could afford to think of her as...

He had to catch his train of thoughts again. No, he most definitely couldn't. Her name had ten characters. So what? What was the big deal?

_Five will keep you alive._

Exactly the kind of dream he'd just had.

_Four, four is death. Five will keep you alive._

Artemis frowned at nothing in particular. Why did he suddenly care about those numbers? 

_I'll see you soon._

Four.

_It's twelve o'clock, Artemis._

Four.

_D'Arvit to you, Fowl._

There was something wrong here. Something that definitely went beyond a dream as a reason. Why had he started counting his words? Why had he started counting _hers_?

Artemis sunk back into his pillows, eyes adrift and lost once again. He didn't know anymore. Whether he could trust her, whether he could trust anyone.

_Of course I saved you._

Five.

_I couldn't do without you._

Five.

It was clear now. Clearer, at least. Despite everything, Artemis found a minuscule smile creeping to the corners of his lips. And he didn't say anything, but there was the tiniest voice in the back of his head demanding it be heard.

 _No_ , it screamed. _You can't trust her._

Artemis frowned. Surely it didn't have a point? How could he not trust Holly when everything they'd gone through so far had been...had been for the greater good?

_In another time._

Artemis took this as a cue to get out of bed and tear his curtains open, finding himself finally glad of the light and the beautiful, flawless rays of the dawn.

"I used to be afraid of the dark," muttered the boy. "Perhaps fours and fives is the fear coming back to me, except sounding a little less intelligent."

He shook his head and forced himself to look healthy. He had, after all, a very long day ahead of him.

 _Besides_ , Artemis determinedly made his way to his wardrobe. _I have no intention of viewing the world in fours and fives._


	2. Unconventional

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning; This chapter contains a LOT of A/H, hence the T rating. You have been warned.

To Artemis, the painting told a story. 

It was neither a very defined nor an especially detailed story; there were just plentiful opportunities to use one's imagination upon looking at the patterns and colours between the frames. Swirls of dark green and sea-blue spread across the canvas starting from the center, representing what was likely the  artist's perception of the universe. Several spiral and dotted galaxies had been scattered with risky brushstrokes across a surface of well-fused colours, and it wasn't that he thought it was perfect; however, the artist had done a splendid job and without the use of the most fancy tools either. He knew this, of course, because the signature borne by the large painting belonged to Artemis Fowl the Second. The artwork was a masterpiece. Obviously. 

He cleared up his makeshift workspace and put the kiddies brushes back where he'd found them. On any other day, Artemis would not have laid a finger on junior art supplies, especially not ones with little kittens printed on them–but this was not his drawing room, and he had been bored. And the canvas was actually cleverly made from an old rag of curtain he'd just happened to find. 

Artemis glanced up at the digital clock and resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Late as usual. Holly really shouldn't make promises she couldn't keep. 

After recovering enough of memories from his previous life to know that the People meant well, Artemis had decided he still wasn't quite satisfied with not being completely his old self again; no genius didn't learn. He had lost a good six years' worth of knowledge and experience and he preferred having it all back. Captain Short hadn't been allowed a longer stay on the surface, so he'd taken it upon himself to learn at her convenience. Holly didn't entirely mind his staying in the apartment adjoining hers so long as he didn't set the building of fire. It had been two days already, and Artemis found himself making steady progress. The more times he heard the story, the more intellect returned to him. And if there were two things Artemis Fowl would persistently go after, it was knowledge and of course gold. 

Just as he propped the painting up against the wall, the doorbell rang and Artemis went to answer it. 

"Don't," snapped an irate voice from behind him. The boy sighed. 

"Alright, Juliet, it's most probably an assassin," he stepped back from the door in surrender. "If you will..?" 

The girl muttered something about how Artemis was going to get himself killed one of these days, and opened the door carefully with her trusty revolver under her jacket. Butler hadn't found the idea of spending a week in an apartment for three-footers very appealing, thus the special request that his sister take over his job for just a week. Juliet wasn't the most disciplined, but he knew he could trust her. 

There Holly Short stood, looking very tired and like the day's events had taken its toll on her. She raised an eyebrow at the Butler. "Gee, nice welcoming."

Juliet shrugged, not looking very apologetic. "Sorry, fairy girl. Butler would kill me."

Holly laughed, stepping in. "Or you could use this wonderful thing called the keyhole."

"I don't trust keyholes," sighed Juliet. "I'm glad to be helping Butler and all, but these have got to be the most boring days of my life. Artemis doesn't even let me watch TV."

"You have earphones and a headset," countered the Mud Boy. "That wouldn't disturb me."

"Earphones should never be worn by a bodyguard," stated Juliet matter-of-factly. "Oh, to hell with it. He's all yours now, fairy girl. I'm just gonna go listen to something good." And with that, she strolled out of the lobby and back into her room. 

As soon as they were alone, Holly turned to Artemis with her arms crossed.   
"Alright, Fowl, what do we do with you now?" 

Artemis showed her over to the tall bar chairs at the counter and sat himself down. It had been the height of luxury the city could afford–literally. At this height he could carry a proper conversation with an elf without having to crane his neck. He straightened his tie before starting to speak, though that was not before Holly noticed the painting. 

"That's pretty."

Artemis blinked. "I beg your pardon?"

"The painting," Holly pointed a finger. "I like the colours." 

Artemis grinned slowly, unable to resist. "Holly, I assure you. There's more to painting a masterpiece than pretty colours."

The elf stretched her feet on the coffee table, and snorted. "I didn't exactly come here for an art lecture, Mud Boy. I haven't even showered. _Showered!_ "

"You did promise to be punctual."

"Yes but–"

"But there was really no need to make a promise you couldn't keep," said Artemis, waving it off with a dismissive hand. 

Holly rolled her eyes, but there was a grin in her voice. "Look who's talking," she reached over to punch him in the arm, and it hurt, but he didn't flinch. She the actually laughed. 

"Alright, Mud Boy," said Holly, settling back down. "Where were we now? Oh yes, your Atlantis Complex. Not the fondest of memories to be recollecting but..."

"A necessary evil," supplied Artemis. Then, upon second thought he added, "Most necessary."

"Are you counting your words again?"

"I might be, Captain Short." 

" _D'Arvit_ , Artemis, the Complex was no joke," Holly gave him a serious look. "That was the most stressful period of my life. Do you have any idea how many times I just wanted to punch that Orion idiot in the face but couldn't because you both shared the same face? Butler would have never forgiven me."   
"I assumed the most stressful period would have been waiting for my resurrection."  
Holly squinted at him. "Are you trying to do something, Artemis?" 

"Excuse me?" 

"Reminding me of the...the things I don't want to remember," said Holly, completely unsure of her words. "Are you?" 

Artemis raised an eyebrow. "Well, it wasn't intentional." 

Holly crossed her arms and glared at him. 

"I'm sorry," he added helpfully. 

The elf sighed, shaking her head. "It's fine. It's just...Frond, you have no idea how much I worried. I thought...I thought you were gone for good, most days, but sometimes it just occurred to me that you're a genius, it's okay, your plan will work." She dropped her eyes closed. "Don't you _dare_ ever do that again."

Artemis didn't reply for the longest time, so she cracked an eye open and checked to see if he had suddenly got sucked back into Limbo or something. 

"Speaking of the Complex," he murmured, gaze directed elsewhere. "I am still unable to hazard a guess as to where Orion came from." 

"Guilt?" suggested Holly, sounding a little less hospitable. "Meddling with fairy magic? You had a lot of theories." 

She may have been imagining it, but the Mud Boy's face flushed the slightest bit.

"Not that aspect."

"Oh _Frond_ ," groaned Holly, burying her face in her hands to cover her own colouring face. "Can we please not go there?" 

"I distinctly remember agreeing to talk about it at a later time." 

The elf looked incredulous. "Really, Artemis? I have a mountain of paperwork waiting for me tomorrow, and you plan to have this chat today? Really?" 

Artemis adjusted his tie again, and on any ordinary person this would've been a sure sign of nervousness; it completely frustrated her that here she was, running away from the topic, flustered, while the Irish genius managed to look so calm and as if it was no big deal at all. Holding the winning cards as usual. The upper ground.

"In that case–"

"No," cut in Holly. "In the name of Haven, please get on with it. Say what you want. Ask me anything. Just...never bring this up after today, okay?" 

Artemis nodded. "If that's what you want." 

They spent a moment in not quite comfortable silence, which Holly was eventually the one to break with a loud sigh. 

"Fine, tell me your theory or something." 

Artemis did all he could not to raise an eyebrow at that, and Holly found herself mortally embarrassed for the second time. D'Arvit. She had asked the wrong question. _The_ question. The very essence of this whole issue, and she just gone and asked it. 

But he answered anyway. "My theory is that Orion's feelings towards you were merely exaggerated reflections of my own." Noticing Holly's twitching eyebrow, he added in good time, "That is to say, I didn't think of you as some sort of princess or damsel in distress, but I did posses some degree of concern where you were involved. You transitioned from my hostage to my best friend. There were obviously a great deal of emotions in the equation, which were enlarged and accentuated upon in Orion's character."

Holly wasn't even looking at him anymore. "In other words you did have romantic feelings."

"Perhaps," admitted Artemis, his face flushing the slightest bit. "But like I said, everything displayed in Orion were hugely exaggerated versions of the truth."

"But there is truth?" interjected Holly, her arms crossed, her scowl directed elsewhere. It was probably a good thing she wasn't looking at him. 

"Holly, I was a hormornal teenager. It didn't mean anything."

The elf rolled her eyes, but finally looked directly at him. He noticed that her tanned complexion went quite well with the reddening colour of her cheeks. "I'm not interested in then, Fowl, I'm asking about now." 

Artemis coughed into a fist. This discussion was starting to enter unknown territory. "Now? Captain, there are still memories of the People that I haven't recollected–" 

His speech was abruptly ended by a pair of lips, and a hand that then grabbed his tie and pulled him into the kiss. Artemis could only stare wide-eyed at his elfin counterpart, whose own eyes were tightly shut and whose complexion was beyond the deepest scarlet by now, before blinking, understanding the situation, closing his eyes and returning the kiss with unmasked uncertainty. 

This seemed to be all Holly required to snap out of her own dream, because the moment he did that, her eyes shot open and she broke off violently. 

"You...D'Arvit, Artemis," she banged a fist on the granite tabletop, immediately ripping her gaze from his. "I didn't think...I...what the hell is wrong with me?!"  
Artemis decided on being rational. "Captain Short, it would be advisable to calm down." 

"Captain Short?" snapped Holly, turning to face him. "We just...just D'Arvitting kissed and you have no right to _Captain Short_ me! Don't lie about it. You don't remember me, or the People, or _anything_ –"

"Holly," said Artemis, a little urgently, placing a hand over hers. "Can we please be a little quiet?" 

Holly scowled. "I hate you."

"Holly–"

He didn't get to finish that one either, because Holly was kissing him again. This time she growled against his lips, and it sounded almost threatening, but Artemis figured what she wanted. Silently willing Juliet not to rush into the lobby, he closed his eyes and, very slowly, very hesitantly, kissed her back. 

"You're bad at this," mumbled the elf, breaking contact for a few seconds. 

"You should have warned me," said the Mud Boy. "And I don't mean to annoy you further, but may I know exactly _why-_ "

Holly kissed him again, but this one was brief and she finally sat back down with an answer. "Because I thought you were dead for six months." 

Artemis blinked, wondering how that solved anything. "Oh." 

"Try taking my place the next time your best friend dies," elaborated the Captain. 

"I did see you die," said Artemis, who hadn't entirely recovered for the multiple unexpected kisses. "At Limbo. It was painful, Holly." 

"It didn't last six months," Holly sighed. Then, after a moment of quiet, "Er, hey, everything that happened just now–"

"I'll erase it from the surveillance, yes," his gaze drifted over to the plentiful possible places in which a certain centaur could have implanted camera bugs. "Although I can't assure you that Foaly hasn't already seen." 

Holly's face turned red again, but it wasn't as bad as the last time. "But you _can_ erase it?"

"Affirmative." 

"Good. Then he won't have any proof even if he nags me for the rest of my existence." She rubbed her eyes tiredly. "Frond, I am _never_ kissing you again." 

"Yet the last time you said that..."

"And this time I mean it," Holly deadpanned, fixing him with a look. "Good. Thanks to you bringing up Orion, we didn't make one bit of progress today." 

Despite himself, Artemis couldn't help a smirk. "If your unconventional methods don't count, I don't know what does."

"Shut up."

"Leaving already?"

Holly was already halfway to the door. "I have a lot of paperwork scheduled for tomorrow," she muttered. "Tell Juliet I said goodnight." 

Artemis caught up to her before she could turn the door handle. "Holly, before you leave."

The elf sighed. "Yeah?"

"I'd like to actually answer that question. About then and now."

Holly raised an eyebrow. "Is this an answer that's going to get your front teeth knocked out?"

"I'd hazard a guess I'd get them knocked out whatever I say." 

"Genius," grinned Holly. "Goodnight, Mud Boy." 

Artemis thought briefly, but no caustic retort came to him, so he simply replied as any ordinary person would. 

"Goodnight, Holly." 

••

Foaly had, indeed, been watching– and occasionally going into hysterics, even enjoying some butter popcorn as well as immediately after building a whole firewall around his new prized possession, a clip of the feed from Artemis's apartment– but this was all Artemis Fowl had expected. 

He hadn't for a moment expected Juliet to have cameras of her own; and he had never bet his money on the clip being sent to Butler himself, along with a hundred odd LOL and kissy-face emojis. 

Artemis Fowl the Second, foiled by a mundane and unimpressive human-made instant messaging application that hadn't even beaten WhatsApp on the charts. 

Yes, he was defenitely getting old. 

••—• 

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to wheredwellthe_brave_at_heart for all the support shown to my fics over here! Thank you :) More dedications to come in later chapters <3  
> This Drabble series is actually practice for something new, something grander to come, but there you go for the moment. Keep reading, and I'll keep updating!


End file.
